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my name is cat
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h8tingthis:

i’m a strong believer that not everything you do needs an explanation. if you want a tattoo, get one. if you rather stay home that night, it’s okay to miss that party. don’t forget that you’re living for yourself. you don’t owe anyone an explanation for your choices or preferences.

(via mshobo)

dutchster:

as a serial killer my name would be the suspense so my victims would be like “oh no, the suspense is killing me” and we would both laugh right before i killed them

(via youpotatomepotato)

soselfimportant:

4:35 Blaze it sorry traffic was crazy

(via pizza)

vvebcame:

asoothingdelight:

SHOUT-OUT TO THAT ONE PERSON IN YOUR LIFE THAT THINKS YOU’RE HILARIOUS AND PEES THEMSELVES LAUGHING EVERY TIME YOU ATTEMPT TO SAY SOMETHING EVEN REMOTELY FUNNY

a shout out to myself

(Source: overcrept, via adorlouis)

speedwalking:

if u are in the ocean nd a shark is bout to bite u point to it firmly u hav to do it firmly and say “hey shark dont do that”

(Source: aquajoggers, via australiansanta)

fasterfood:

imagine being a newborn baby. u could fuck with people so hard. like someone goes “oh, how old are you?” you go “55”. they get confused as fuck. “wtf? u dont look close to 55”. at this point u have the upper hand. you smirk, and say “55…minutes”. everyone gets a good laugh. imagine

(via australiansanta)

(Source: alxbngala, via rachealdavis)

toomuchswagcannotsee:

30 problems of homework more like 30 more reasons to become a full time prostitute

(via pizza)

skindianabones:

hey girl i can’t freestyle, but i can rap the danny phantom theme song for you

(via orgasmic-humor)